"Get your money up"

I really sympathize with men these days with all this women empowerment going on. I was listening to Keisha Cole and Keri Hilson’s song “Get your money up” which is simply saying, look, I have my money so you have to be bigger than that to even come close to impressing me. Keri sings“ I aint your average girl, I been all around the world, if you wanna wow me then get your money up”. Talk about pressure. And there is all this talk about empowerment that has gripped everyone, which is really a great thing I suppose, but what is it really doing for power dynamics in relationships. Had a conversation with a friend the other day who was simply saying he would rather date older women because they know what they want and can act upon it. “Really?” said Tari. “Yes”, said Tari’s friend, “they can just book a hotel room when they want to have sex, or just take me for lunch when they want to talk” said Tari’s Friend.
So is it really that older women know what they want, or they are just more economically empowered to be able to make decisions that suit them? “So if I am 19 years old (he he he) and I have lots of money, and can book a hotel room and take you out for lunch when I want, would you consider me?” Tari said. To which Tari’s friend reacted…bwai bwai ( blink blink)

Financial security is something that women need and I think that is universal. In my opinion, financial security is not about having a fat bank account and “getting your money up”, but just knowing that there is a fall back plan when I cannot hold my own. So what happens when there is no fall back plan? Or if the fall back plan is not enough to sustain what is required? Has our society become so money oriented that we have even forgotten the core of what relationships are all about? But we also have to be honest and agree with Marshall Munhumumwe when he sang “ane mari ndiye mukuru” ( whoever has money is the bigger person). My former boss always said to me money makes things happen; so always make sure that you have it. If you want to travel you cannot go ahead without money, if you want to eat you have to have money. To survive you have to have money. So economic empowerment is necessary for one to be in a decision making position. So then the problem comes when the women are able to make decisions that they wouldn’t have ordinarily made if they didn’t have money. Which also explains why many men get away with so many ills in marriages because they are the breadwinners, and how do you bite the hand that feeds you? However this sometimes leaves us in compromising situations because you are left with no options but to settle for your pathetic situation because you have nothing better to turn to.

I am definitely for economic empowerment, especially for women so that they can make informed decisions for the right reasons. I am also for economic empowerment for men, because sometimes we assume that they are economically empowered or know how to empower themselves, yet some really don’t, and that compromises their roles as fathers and “breadwinners” (in quotes because I feel that these days breadwinning is gender neutral).

So hey… GET YOUR MONEY UP!